This is what I said

Choose Well From THE REAL BLING Album

2008-09-06T08:09:00.000-07:00

2008 Dreams Come True Media, Inc.

All rights of the sound and video of the recorded work reserved. Unauthorized copying, hiring, lending, public performance and broadcasting of this recording prohibited.

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What if?

2008-08-28T17:23:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling good today. I have been feeling good for the past couple of days. The comments and feedback I have been getting on myspace, are encouraging. I wasn't sure how people would respond to my music. I heard what my wife, nieces, nephews, sisters, and cousins thought about it, but never heard what others had to say.

I got a message from a sister that has some really good poems, her delivery is fresh, her words are deep, and shes having the same problem I had, financial, beats and all.

Then it dawned on me, five years ago I was in my basement trying to build up. I'm still building up, but I finally see this going somewhere. Its as though Ive climbed a small peak, and the summit still isn't reached, but its not as far. For many years, I was fluctuating, going from making beats and rhymes every day to not making anything for months.

Giving in to that voice.

The voice is what destroys many dreams, its often disguised as the voice of reason.

"How can you sit in front of this keyboard and try to make beats, you have two kids and a wife to support!.....Just let this whole music thing become a hobby, give it up man your getting old. Be realistic here, how many people before you tried this? What are people going to think of your weak beats? It aint working, JUST GIVE UP"

That is the voice of doubt. The voice that makes or breaks an artist. Some artists take that voice and use it to their advantage, they try harder and even if things look crappy their persistent. It took me a very long time to figure it out.

What is it? You ask....

It is a persons calling. What they were put on earth to do. When I was younger I always thought about it, what am I to do in this world? Will I change anything around me? Am I just another soul that society has dismissed? As I got older those questions faded away, slowly but surely. I went about working to support my beautiful sons and wife. Dismissing that yearning call. I was depressed for a while, because I knew that music is my personal calling. It is my way of expressing myself, and the conditions around me.

I was too absorbed with the idea of failure. So scared that it might not work out, what if people hate it?

Funny how I feared failure, without even trying. Failure is a tough word to swallow, but I never thought about "what if this is a success", "what if my music makes a positive impact","what if kids listen to it, and think o man I need to stop trying and start doing".......

Instead of focusing on negative (what if's) I started focusing on positive (what if's)....and here I am messaging talented young men and women. I want to say thanks to all of the people that have messaged me, because their kind words and support are what I thought I would never hear. Next time you feel like your going to give up, ask yourself this; what if my thoughts can bring a positive change to those around me?

Isna here I come!

2008-08-23T08:13:00.001-07:00

Isna is approaching so quickly. At first I was scared that I wouldn't make it, since there is a deadline and I thought I wouldn't be able to come up with the money in order to reserve the booth. Alhamdallah, everything is working out to my advantage, I was just in time, and now I have a booth.

The company's name is "Dreams Come True Media"........now some people might think that sounds a little cheezy, but there has been a lot of thought put into the company's name. The company isn't just for record labels, it will become much more then that Inshallah. It will expose young Muslims with talent. It will invest in the arts of the youth. This year all we have is a CD titled "The Real Bling". Inshallah next year we will have more of a variety.

Going back to the title "The Real Bling"....We hear rappers take about "bling", and how valuable their chains/watches/rings/bracelets are. So the word bling is always associated with being valuable and rich. My song "the real bling" questions what truly is valuable. A decked out car, or Iman? What is the true meaning of wealth? That is why my album title is The Real Bling!

Even if I don't make a cent at isna, I'm here to stay inshallah.

Getting somewhere

2008-08-17T12:07:00.000-07:00

I finally have a short video clip.

Making it two all together. I have one for a song called "My world" and another saying called "Don't Cry". I have to say I feel like I'm getting somewhere. I always knew it would work out, but in the past couple of months Ive felt like Ive been sprinting in place. This has all made me question how much I really want this. I think maybe if it would have come easy to me, I wouldn't appreciate it as much. A lot of things in life are like that, the easier something is the less appreciated it is. Like they say everything happens for a reason.

The myspace is finally setup, I have a youtube account as well. What makes this CD great is the fact that its a team of people working on it. So many people have come together to make this happen. It goes to show you that when you set out on a journey and you put your mind to it, Allah (swt) makes the path smooth.

Sure I had my downs, God knows that. I came to a point where I was so mad at myself. I was almost there, so close to having everything done, and then I fell into listening to every ones criticism. Which lead to switching some tracks, which lead to stalling and waiting longer to finish it. Well its done, Alhamdallah. Now all I have to worry about is making copies and getting to Isna. I didn't rent the booth yet, so I need to look into that aspect of it, but inshallah I have about 13 days left. Approximately two weeks, Inshallah it will all work out for the best.

Prologue No(logue)

2008-08-12T15:30:00.000-07:00

I went in to the studio yesterday, and tried tweaking my intro. There are soo many different opinions when it comes to that track. Its a simple one minute prologue, that should describe my whole album. Its almost like a thesis statement, unlike a thesis statement this is the one song that will make people want to listen to the rest of the track. Whereas with a thesis statement people are almost obliged to read the rest.

The first version I had of the intro is soft, short and good. Not great, but good enough to be released. At this point I'm not sure if I have time to be picky. Isna is coming up, in about three weeks. Every time I mention Isna I get nervous, not sure if I will be able to make it. Not making Isna isn't even an option, because if that does occur then I would have to wait till December to release something. Plus Isna is an opportunity I really don't want to let go.

I sent the track to a couple of close friends, critiques and some family members. I got a positive response from some and a negative response from others. There was no "in the middle" response. It seems like its a track that's either loved or hated. I am actually very very confused at the moment, because I was satisfied with the way it was to begin with, and after tweaking it I like the second version as well. I feel like the second version is raw, and the lyrics are good they describe who I am as an artist, and they also describe my album.

What to do? Ask more people? Maybe I should just do without an intro. Who cares if there isn't one? I care actually, I don't think I would release it without an intro. The comments I received about the second version where all similar, the negative comments were that I was trying too hard, and I sound like I'm screaming instead of rapping. However the positive comments contradict that, and say it sounds great that I'm outraged, because that makes it sound soulful and it also makes it sound like its coming from a deep anger that resonates inside.

The one

2008-08-07T10:24:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to get to Isna...

Working on a myspace, their is so much to learn about this whole myspace stuff. I didn't even know how to make my own background. Took me a while, but alhamdallah I figured it out. Every time I speak to someone about myspace they say the same thing "I never had a myspace". It made me question whether myspace is bad. It seems as though its cool now a days to boycott it.

For now I will see where it takes me. I still need to figure out how to change the web layout and what not. It felt strange to sign up as a band/artist. Not a bad weird, a good weird of course. Isna is the 29th and its in Columbus Ohio. At first I didn't think I would be able to make to isna this year. Since I'm pressing my luck with time, and the album cover, web page and all that fancy stuff attached to advertising music.

I don't want to settle for any cover though, because I want the cover to represent me. The most recent cover I have, is really good. However, I still feel like I might be able to find something better, everyone around me thinks its great. Maybe I'm too picky! I cant help but be picky, a lot of my self has gone into this cd, and I want to perfect it as much as I can. I don't want to feel like I settled. I want to see a cover and think WOW, that's perfect, that's amazing, that's breath taking. I still haven't found the one!

The cycle

2008-08-04T14:43:00.000-07:00

Here I am sitting in front of an empty screen, trying not to think negative. You know its funny when you try your best to think positive and every thing around you isn't making it easier. I have been told over and over again that whatever is bound to impact you and others, is also very very hard to reach. That doesn't mean its not reachable that just means its a damn hard climb. I have been thinking positive for the past couple of months. I went into the studio recorded some tracks, and now I have a whole album, finished, finito, done, khalas, over. I am content with it the way it is, I know its not perfect, I know its not the best, I know I have flaws, but I am content with releasing it the way it is. Sometimes its the imperfections in life that stand out and strike people as being talented. However, there always is a however, isn't there?

Getting to the studio for the right cause, was a struggle in its self, it all started with a man that heard me talk about how I love music, and how my soul is calling for this to be done. I was 17 when I discovered this about myself. This being my love for music, my calling as they say. I had a hook up with some friends of mine, they brought me to a studio and I was ready to start recording, right then and there. I could have easily been drawn to the party,drinking, and drugs way of life. Looking back at that now, it feels like I'm describing a path I could have taken, I wonder where I would be now if I had steered towards that direction. I probably wouldn't be here right now, with a wife and two amazing boys. I probably wouldn't be doing what I'm doing now.

During those times I was your typical boy, rapping about platinum chains, fancy cars and material crap. What would have made me different from anyone else, if I would have kept my lyrics at that level? I wonder.

Even when my lyrics weren't good, I kept going at it. Not with a sense of cockiness, or a sense of " I think I am the best", No not at all. But with a sense of receiving a gift and not being able to let go of it . I was living and breathing feeling guilty. Guilty that I knew I can achieve this dream, I knew I can get better. I knew it was possible, but I was dismissing that, because I was so consumed with failure, and with worldly matters. I stopped trying, because I was scared and because of the circumstances life threw at me.

I didnt have money to go into a studio, I didn't have the skills to make my own beats. I was basically stuck in a rut. A rut I put myself in, and had no idea how to get out of.

The man that I spoke to about my struggle and love for music, informed me that music can be used in a good way. Not only can it be used to corrupt minds, but it can also be used to better minds. The fact that music can be used towards bettering people, appealed to me. I was drawn to the fact that it can be done, but I would have to learn more about this so called good part of music.

Besides these Islamic singers are all so boring and lame, and I would never listen to the stuff that's out there by Muslim singers. How would my friends, nephews and cousins and people in my generation listen to something as boring as Islamic songs. I had this certain way of thinking, when it came to religious songs. I even felt bad for not being a fan of Islamic music, I wanted to but couldn't get into it. Why was that? Maybe it was the beat, maybe it was the words, maybe it was the fact that it didn't relate to what I was going through as a Young Muslim man in the states.

I sort of felt guilty for wanting to convince myself that it wasn't appealing, but it really wasn't appealing at that time. Its not like I was an atheist at the time, of course I was born into Islam, so I considered myself a Muslim. However, I was just Muslim by name. I would get close to Islam, then get further away from it. It was a cycle, a cycle that lasted through the 90's.

My first post

2008-07-29T01:22:00.001-07:00

Here goes...my first post. It has been a while since I have wanted to start this, but I just haven't had the time to actually sit down and go through with each step.
I want to say welcome to whoever reads this, and Inshallah (by the will of God) next post I will introduce myself, and my objective.